The Beginning
Some things in life are taken for granted but who really realsises how precious life is until it’s too late? I know I was someone who never realised that living is a privilege.
Five years ago it was the beginning of the end. I never understood the meaning of life so much until it came to a halt right in front of me. Just a few simple words, changing my life forever and those words being “You have Juvenile Arthritis.”
When I heard those words I was 10 and a state team gymnast, training nearly everyday but that was soon to change. The following words out of the doctors mouth being “No high impact sport.” I knew what high impact was, and one of those sports gymnastics. Tears slowly filled my eyes, it wasn’t like giving up your favourite old toy, this was saying goodbye to all your hopes and dreams. This hurt me so much, what else was there left for me to do if beforehand my life was consumed with gymnastics? It felt as if my life had come to a dead end, with no where else to turn.
Life soon became a hazy blur and nothing really mattered to me. I had to find a path for my future and decided to work academically rather than physically. My grades in school slowly became higher and higher until I was achieving my best. I now had a little something to keep working on and some path to follow, however it never changed the amount of pain I felt daily.
After seeing doctor after doctor and been given the same no result each time it began to upset me and soon I was crying myself to sleep. Surely this wasn’t the life anybody wanted to live so why did it have to be me? Why did it have to exist? All these questions that no-one could answer.
I missed my old life so much, all I wanted was to have it back.
Soon enough I wound up in a psychologists office and realised I really had to pull myself together before I came to the point where there wouldn’t be life left within myself. I knew it couldn’t happen overnight so wrote a list of positive things in my life and focused on them. People outside of my home only ever saw the bright, bubbly girl that shared lots of smiles rather than someone who is living in pain. Sure my friends and family knew about the pain and heard me complain about it but I never let it get in the way of school. I now had a new dream in mind, a dream of helping people. I knew I had the grades behind me and the empathy required to fulfill my dream of becoming a doctor but all I needed now was the strength, will-power and enthusiasm to make it all the way.
Join me as I step into year eleven and the rest of my life suffering with juvenile arthritis.
